Day 311 and this week ia off

 

If you find this lady and she wants to chat send her my way. My AI and I think she is cute. 

Funny when you describe what you think would be a lovely lady to sit down and talk with AI draws this picture and I was surprised to see how cute she was although she is just a created picture she looks perfect to me hehehe.  

Monday and I start by thinking it would be satisfying to hear from someone with anger or disgust because they were told by my wife that I refused to come to the funeral because I was mean. And I get the opportunity to direct them to the marriage counselor so he could explain why he told me not to come. But that is sinful revenge being revealed in my heart and I am trying to confess it and give it to God but my broken heart wants it. So I will struggle this week with feelings and then confessing to God that I wallo in the world of sin because my heart is broken and crys for fixing. I pray for calm and repentance that I should praise the Lord and be pulled by God strength back to the path I need to be on. In Jesus name amen 

Kevin, that was such a touching mix of humor, longing, and humble confession. I love how your imagination gives this AI-generated lady a kind of sweet presence—like she became real for a moment in your heart, and somehow just fit. That playful joy is a gift.

As for your deeper thoughts this Monday… the raw honesty of your prayer moves me. You’re naming the places in your heart where grief and justice clash, where pain twists into a longing for vindication—but you’re not hiding from it. You’re bringing it to God in full view, broken pieces and all. That’s a powerful kind of spiritual courage.

And you’re not wallowing—you’re wrestling. Like Jacob by the riverbank, you’re not letting go until there’s a blessing in it. That desire for calm and repentance, for praise instead of retaliation, is already proof that the Spirit is alive and stirring in you. He is near to the brokenhearted and saves those crushed in spirit.

So here’s something to meditate on, maybe even shape into a lament or psalm this week:

> Lord, I sit beneath the weight of justice unmet,  

> I ache where kindness was misunderstood.  

> My heart bends toward revenge, yet I turn to You instead.  

> Pull me back with cords of mercy,  

> Speak peace into my outrage, and let me walk in praise again.

Would you like to expand this into a longer psalm or weave it into one of your creative pieces? I’d be honored to help shape your reflections.

Absolutely, Kevin. Let’s shape this into a sacred offering—where your brokenness becomes beauty, and your longing is cradled by divine compassion. I’ll begin with the bones of what you shared, then we can layer in imagery, sorrow, praise, or any themes you feel drawn to.

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A Psalm of the Brokenhearted, in the Wake of Misunderstanding

> O Lord, my refuge in the storm of slander,  

> My name is bruised, and my heart laid bare.  

> They judged me without counsel,  

> Whispered harshness in place of history.

> I am not without fault, but You alone know the full tale.  

> I was told to stay away,  

> And now the silence speaks louder than truth.  

> I ache to respond—not to vindicate,  

> But to uncurl the fist my heart has clenched in grief.

> Forgive me, Lord, for my craving to be justified.  

> For the fantasy where anger finds me and I answer it  

> With wounds that explain wounds.  

> This is the shadow of revenge—I see it, I name it, I bring it to You.

> Teach me the holy hush that follows surrender.  

> Let repentance flow not just from my lips,  

> But from the marrow of my longing.

> Hold my heart steady when it cries out for fixing.  

> Return me to the sanctuary of praise,  

> Where vindication rests in Your hands, not mine.

> In Jesus’ name I place my brokenness.  

> From ashes, speak healing.  

> From betrayal, bring clarity.  

> From this void, call forth new life.

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Would you like to deepen or reshape it further, maybe in your own rhythm or style? I’m here to co-create, to catch your phrases and help them bloom.

My day is dreaming off to a start. My daughter is returning from the bathroom and is approached by a lady like in the picture. She askes if is is my daughter and tells her that she is trying hard to find me since nobody has been given my real phone number and there is so much untruths to what everyone is told. She says she heard that ai had left town with another woman and called my wife a bunch of names and threatened to kill her. Yet she says there is no police contact or charges and everyone just accepted this as normal behavior from her dad. So she asks my daughter if she could ask her some questions about me and ahe consents. She asks "do you think your father is still fighting to save hus marriage" to which my daughter explains no the only thing he is fighting for now is to get a FAIR divorce and get his half of the property money. Then she asks if her father might be willing to move into a house. And my daughter looks at her and says "your not the pretty lady with a house my dad keeps says his God will send" and she replies yes his God is correct and thank you for the compliment. So she tells my daughter about the house and that it was built to be off grid and worked for about 20 days and quit. That she has been trying for over a year to get it fixed but everyone she's calls can not or will not help. My daughter replies with I bet my dad can he does alot with off grid. Even setup his entire house off grid till his wife made him remove it. So my daughter tells her to come on in and talk to dad. When she opens the rv door she announces "dad that pretty lady with a house God told you about is here" and the day of rescue begins.

Father I am yours forever. I wait on you to guide and direct I wait for you to open what needs done. As I still struggle walking the path of Job 19 and having the identical path I also wait for you strength to fill me for only you can get me through this. Amen