Day 250 man they just keep piling up

 

The days just keep coming and yet there is no end in site. I pray for a home and I pray for my dogs. I know that God loves me because He and only He could bless me so much and make animals show God love so well. Yet I am stuck in this sewer pond with no end in site. Please God give me a end. Amen

Today was a lazy day since 3 days in a row of travel and doctors. So mostly laid around this morning and kept cool high today of 84 so warm. Went for a walk and got greeted by a nice young buck hehehe 

He stood and watched me walk past him hehehe then day dreamed again of finding a home and moving in and I always dream of divorce since there has not been any attempt what so ever to even suggest that I try to move back in with my wife and I do not think there ever will be. She won't ever ask me to help her with yard or anything so I can honestly say there is no going back there ever. I just can't figure out why God would let this keep playing on with the lies and deceiving and secrets that satan is using and not open a way for me to move on it really bothers me.

But back and waiting for sun down to go to sleep hehehe start a new day.  Guess I play some games and pretty sure there won't be a phone call tonight. So just wait for bed.

Wow I so love this Job Chapter 5

Job 5:1-27 EasyEnglish 1 Eliphaz continued to speak. ‘You may shout, Job, and ask someone to help you. But no one will answer you. Even if you ask the angels, they will not help you. 2 A fool may be so angry with other people that he dies. He may want to have the things that they have. He may die because he wants them too much. 3 I myself have seen the way that a fool lives. He seems to be happy. And his life seems to be comfortable. But soon God sends trouble to him. 4 His children are not safe any more. People will say that they have done wrong things. Then no one will say that his children are honest. 5 Hungry people take plants from his fields. They even take them from among the weeds. And other people use his money to buy their drinks. 6 But difficulties do not grow like plants. And troubles do not come from the ground. 7 You know that from every fire smoke rises into the air. So every man that is born has troubles in his life. 8 I suggest that you ask God to help you. I suggest that you tell him about your problems. 9 He does great things that nobody can understand. Nobody can count the surprising things that he has done. 10 He gives rain for the earth. He sends water for the fields. 11 He makes humble people important. Some people are sad because someone has died. But God makes those people safe. 12 Clever people may try to do wrong things. But God will not let them do such things. 13 He sees the things that clever people are doing. And he causes them to stop doing those things. 14 They find that it is dark at midday. They can see no better in the day than at night. 15 He saves poor people from death. And he stops bad people from hitting them. 16 God helps poor people. So they can hope that their future lives will be good. But those who do wrong things must be quiet. 17 If God teaches you the right way to live, you should be happy. He may decide that you should have difficulties in your life. Do not be sad if the Almighty decides that. 18 He may cause you to have pain. But he will make you well again. He may hurt you, but he will give you health again. 19 Often he will save you from trouble. Many times, he will keep you safe from danger. 20 He will keep you alive if there is a famine. And he will also keep you alive if there is a war. 21 He will not let people say bad things about you. And you will not be afraid when people attack you. 22 You will laugh if there is a famine. You will smile if there is danger. You will not be afraid of wild animals. 23 They will not be wild any more when you are near them. And there will be no danger in your fields. 24 You will know that your home is safe. You will check all the things you have. And you will find that they are all there. 25 You will know that you will have a large family. You will have many children and grandchildren. It will not be any easier to count them than to count the grass in a field. 26 You will live for many years. Plants grow until the right time to pick them. So you will live until it is the right time for you to die. And you will have good health until you die. 27 We have checked all this. And we have found that it is true. So listen to what we say. And do what we suggest.’

Well as expected no phone or contact from my wife. Pretty sure my standing up for myself has blowen a hole right through her "doesn't believe in divorce" saying she came up with about 6 weeks ago. Which means it's probably going to be a good preaching from the biased counselor about how bad l was and that I need to have counseling to be fix so my wife can live with me and then how much she loves me bla bla bla I totally expect this to be a very very bad point in counseling and marriage so Father hear me please. I do not know why standing up for my self and demanding that we have a honest open relationship without all the secrets and lies ends and why satan is allowed to tell me I am bad and a loser but I do know God that you love me and call me friend and child so nothing will be done to me because in You Lord I am victorious. So Father fill my heart with Your confidence and protect me completely from everything satan is building up right now and from here on. I walk in Your Victory God and beg of You to watch over me, give me words to say and actions to deal with and Father guide me along Your plan for me and not what anyone else or satan has please thank you and thank you so much for being with me today on my walk and the great blessing of someone to talk to yesterday. Father bless the nurse with Your Comfort and love so she knows how much that blessing ment to me. Amen

Nite