Day 190 Still in the loop of cold and wait

 


Monday and the wait is still on. Today was a run to cody for my daughters doctor appointment and lunch then home. While I was there the VA called and told me that all my HIV and STI tests were negative so that was great news and with that paper in hand I can fight any lies my wife might pull about me cheating on her and getting aids etc because she has already told some people that lie. But they said my calcium level was still .2 above the normal range which tops out at 10.2 and I am 10.4 so they say no more but while I was off it for 4 weeks before this last blood draw my shoulders started hurting in the joints and my energy level was like zombie mode so I forgot to ask them since I was excited about the tests if they could see what my level was before 2024 when I got bit by the stupid brown recluse spider. Hate to think that bite is still screwing with my body. So hopefully it will be normal or lower. 

Anyway I also heard from my PI and he said all the data extract was done he will try to find voicemail and also said the greybull and basin police depts were being jerks because he thinks they don't want somebody to open up a can of worms if they find a death threat was actually removed with a bribe. But he has a case that will take him all week and he is emailing a bunch more people to try and find my complaint that disappeared. I am praying that God will bring this out and the recording so when I am faced with divorce since that seems the only thing my wife wants and I pray that God is showing the marriage counselor this same side of my wife that I have been living with for 25 years that maybe the church will wake up and stop this before the flock gets wiped out. Please please oh Lord let my PI find the recording and complaint not for headline news or even news but to make what is about to happen equal and we can split our house equally and move on and Lord give me a place to live in the country with nice house and maybe a shop and to get everything moved there and to get custody of my puppies and start resting in a new field were I may serve you oh Lord.

The jaws of dark are clamping down and soon the light will be no more. I will sit in my room and think or the day and pray for God to show me the way.  It seems such a comfort to cuddle my cap and dream of hugging my dogs.  My heart can feel theirs as they beat and lick my face and the joy is as warm as the sun.  Soon I will close my eyes and the night will be gone. LORD make tomorrow better give me signs of progression and show me Your Love because that is what make the whole day seem right amen and good night 

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